charliehall – how can you compare physical attraction to crabcake? Why not a burger at KD or a steak? where in the torah does it say you can’t have a pretty wife? yes, beauty ideally should be based MAINLY on personality and middos but as Moq said, the physical attraction is a REALITY. perhaps it is unfortunate but still a reality. and don’t pick on the fact that he used the word mishugas. what he means is that it is certainly not the way Moshe Rabbeinu would have looked for a wife, but then again Moshe wouldn’t have set foot into any of the restaurants we have hear either. does that make the restaurants silly and against Judaism? perhaps in a very ideal world, but unfortunately we live in America in 2010. Sorry folks.
theprof1 – your attitude that any person who isn’t married at the tender age of 21 (ok, that was an exaggeration. you probably meant 23 or 24) has unreasonable demands is preposterous. I hate to be melodramatic but there is something wrong with your emunah and you stink of apikorsus. Does Hashem have no say in this? The Kli Yakar says by Eliezer when he found a wife for Yitzchak that although by money one can make excuses and rationalize why the wealthy are wealthy, when it comes to shidduchim it is clear that Hashem is in control precisely because so many great people take long to get married and so many people with a lot left to be desired are married early. I personally am a bochur who is older than 23-24 and i can tell you that I am one of the least picky people in the world. When I go out with a person who has a flaw, whether in looks, personality, even frumkeit, I give them a chance and look for every drop of chein I can and discuss with my rosh yeshiva how to go about it. It is people like you who make the parsha of shidduchim so difficult and painful. People like me are always being made to feel like there is something wrong with us. Sorry to be so upset but unfortunately there are many theprof1’s out there and it is very frustrating.