Reply To: Tips On How To "Calm Down"

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#710791
WIY
Member

cofeefan

The truth is, it sounds like you may be a high stress person and tend to stress yourself out. Maybe the idea is for you to work on becoming more patient. I believe Rabbi Zelig Pliskin has a book on Patience that may be worth reading. His books are all good. Or listen to shiurim on the topic.

Theres also a book by a non Jewish author Richard Carlson called

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff–and it’s all small stuff. Supposed to be an amazing book.

But the bottom line is that when you start getting stressed, think about it and ask yourself, is it worth it? Is this so important that I need to get all bent out of shape over it? Will I let the traffic, or my co worker or whatever it is control me? No! I control me, Im cool and in control. Talk it out if you are in private and have that luxury. Realize its a momentary and insignificant annoyance (in most cases) that will soon pass. Find something else to think about. Distract yourself.

In reality most things we fret about or get stressed about are insignificant and minor issues. Traffic, long lines at the grocery…Be positive and grateful and happy that you have a car to drive, that you can afford a car, that it works and doesnt break down every day. That it isnt overly noisy and isnt a piece of junk. That its nice…theres always positive things you can focus on.

By the way if you often find yourself stuck in traffic make sure you have either a nice variety of music that you like, to listen to or find interesting shiurim, or lectures on various things that you can use to entertain you. The car ride can be an experience of Torah growth if you listen to a Torah shiur, and at the same time, if you control yourself from getting angry and stressed you are working on your character traits and improving your middos. Your commute becomes an exercise in building the middah of patience and self control under stressful conditions.