It uses the word toevah about non-kosher food, as well.
It is somewhat ludicrous for somebody without the nisayon who gets no schar for it to focus his energies criticizing people who do have the nisayon. What a waste of energy. When I get upstairs, they will not give me one iota of schar for this mitzva since I was fortunate not to have any tayva for it. I can’t put myself in the shoes of somebody who does. Halevai I should focus my energies in controlling myself regarding things I do have a tayva for.
As far as Reb Moshe’s tshuva, it is very shver, since it seems to contradict the metzius. Reb Moshe claims that gays are regular people who adopted this tayva because it is extreme, and the only pleasure is that since it is wrong, it is exciting. But clearly the metzius is that gays have no tayva for women, and only a tayva for men. They didn’t decide to develop this tayva for the sake of doing extreme aveiros. They were simply born with it in place of the normal tayva for the opposite gender.
As far as the military goes, I have some questions whether it is wise to take gays in, since it makes their straight bunkmates uncomfortable. Just like the military would not advocate men and women sharing barracks, there may be an issue here as well. It may also be a battle-readiness issue, if there is improper behavior taking place when the soldiers are supposed to be getting a good night’s rest. But these are practical issues, not religious ones.