tikvuchka,
You said: “I met my husband through a dating website via a shadchan.” You weren’t entirely clear. Did you and your now husband first contact each other directly, and the shadchan came into the picture to ostensibly facilitate the early communications? Or was the shadchan the one who actually suggested the two of you as a shidduch?
If it is the first case, I’m not even sure the “shadchan” is really your shadchan altogether. If it is the second case, then it seems she is completely your shadchan, and you owe her the shadchanus.