When first hearing the term (and being called it) it was sort of annoying (you know, catagorizing another jew…) but eventually it became something special, something to hold onto, something lav davka to make a big deal about.
As you’ve seen, many people have different views about it. Therefore, I think that Ny’ers who talk that way, shouldn’t use that term freely. If they know the person, and they know that person doesn’t care about that term, than use it till it dies, but if they are talking to someone who doesn’t prefer that lashon, than why instigate hatred?
In addition, I’m pretty sure there was an artical about living “In town vs. Living Out of town” in a recent Mishpacha artical. In that artical it defined in town and out of town. Ayin Sham for details, but the Yisod was that In town would be a place where you dont have to take a half an hour trip to buy everything you need. You can make one quick stop and pick up everything you need on one block or at one big supermarket.
Maybe nowadays these terms should be chucked out the window because of this.
but iyhbyu, you make a great point about there is a world outside Ny.
but your post is a Tolda (subcatagory) in regard to a larger discussion- the practice of people catagorizing other jews.