i know its sounds crazy but talk to alot of pple who know the person and just listen to them talk. if there are negative words then investigate but it probably is an indication of something worse. Its not that you are only looking for perfect people. Its that you are looking for :alle maalos” becuase life itself throws you so many curve balls you need to start out with as many maalos as possible. Dont ever base a shidduch on negative traits. Like he is so perfect for me we both love shopping for clothes, or spending money, or are self centered. Traits for a mate need to be positive even if you think differently about yourself. and if you are a girl, i would BEG YOU to put yourself in a situation where you see him interact with his mother. how does he treat her? how does he talk to her? because he will treat you like that one day. DEFINITELY…NO MATTER WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES… and if you ever hear the words. “Do your homework” run like the wind!!!!!
one other really important aspect is this. Once you have decided to get engaged, DONT get engaged right away. Take a week of just getting used to the idea and making sure you are comfortable with the decision. Also, after that period guys usually let their guard down, and dates that are more like errands to the cleaners are sometimes more telling about a person than a formal or casual planned date. Have a few of those and then make sure you are comfortable. Its a must to have a mentor who is married and knows you well. NOT JUST THE CR!!!