Eclipse, isn’t it better to talk to us than to talk to yourself or to the wall? Honestly. You vented a few normal thoughts, concerns and issues. Yes it is true whether you are divorced or just concerned about “what if”. The thought of starting over with someone new is terrifying.
However, if you are starting over with an adult forty years and over, someone who was married before, they should have learned the basics. They should smell clean and fresh when you meet them and date them. They should look clean and put together, if not you probably should move on. I don’t think you need to worry about the basics and definitely should not have to put up with simple things like personal hygiene the second time around.