cshapiro: true, they all say wonderful things, until learn how to really ask. i’m talking from experience. after many years of being single, i learned to call at least 5 different people and ask very specific questions, listen for hesitancy, follow up with “what do you mean?” and more questions. also, do your parents know exactly what you are looking for, not just in general, but what you really deeply want? if you’re the oldest, your parents may not have much experience asking questions – talk to others who can also help you. most honest are usually the boys’ rebbes, if they understand clearly who you are and what you want. be specific and clear. same words can mean different things to different people. sorry, if i’m coming on strong, it’s just that it took me years to get this right. (after getting married, i helped some people do it right, and they married the first person they went out with). good luck 🙂
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