In my circle/community,the bigger the wedding the better. Weddings by us cost upwards of a hundred thousand dollars. This is the norm. The hall by itself that is the ” in” place is at least 50G for the most basic package.
There is no way DH and I can afford to do that for our daughters,who are young still,but I am still thinking about it.
I proposed an idea to DH and my family,only to get yelled at from all sides. Simply put,I would make the wedding at the “in” place,but on a Sunday afternoon,and serve only desserts. My thinking is why should I put myself in debt so that “the people” can eat steak,and lamb chops and whatnot.
Husband and in laws,and family said to me to stop taking like that,because lest the word come out that I don’t want to do a wedding,my girls will not get “good” suitors,
I’m still not falling for it. My girls ate great,they will get what is good for them. No??
Husband says not true,he knows many,many stories in which guys were told about a particular nice girl and were all gung-ho to go out with her,but when the prospective father in law told the young man about his making a scaled down wedding,the young men,ALL said no and wouldn’t even meet the girl. DH said he knows f at least 3 guys this happened with.
So what are young families to do?? We hold back on things when they are young so we can save up for thier wedding,so that the guests can et a good meal and they can get a groom.
Makes perfect sense,right???
I’m willing to do the dessert thing,even at a different ” not in” place.but my community unfortunately won’t hear of it.