yogibooboo: It appears from your first post that you said the right thing, but whether or not you did the right thing depends on how you said it. If your tone was condemnatory or effete, you said the right thing but did it the wrong way.
Your second post reads in part: “i see day in and day out parents not caring and its driving me crazy.” You have therefore plainly said that if you are not crazy, you recognize that you are on your way. Admitting your problem is the first step to recovery.
As for “Spanish babysitter/housekeepers”, I know lots of them – they are called “Sephardim.”