Reply To: Desperate husbands facing divorce

For obvious reasons, it is diffciult to post personal information (such as dollar amount of support) publically. The Petur stipulated that civil license must be obtained to remarry, so a civil divorce is needed. Plus, no woman in her right mind would want to date someone who is civilly connected to another woman (take for example, if he remarried without a civil divorce, the husband could never get the new wife on his health insurance plan, since there is no marriage license).

I was hoping that rather than giving out specifics on my situation, people could reflect on what other people (men or women) went through and how they got through it to restart their lives. It is so very difficult to be hanging in mid-air, not being able to get on with my life, especially when I was the one “tossed-out”. I was on a Chol Hamoeid trip with one of my children and it was very painful to realize that all other nearly parents had their spouses with them on their family trip whereas I was in no-one’s land. Is it possible to take on a more positive (thankful) attitude and look at the long-term picture? Undoubtedly I should count my blessings and be thankful that I was Zoche to have healthy children considering the health struggles many other parents have with ill children and those who are childless and can’t even take any children on a Chol HaMoeid trip; unfortunately I am such a Hailege Yid to adopt such a positive view.