Middle path: you know comfortingly enough to me, and hopefully you too, you sound very much like me in regards to social outlet (having/had a rough life, not really having a rabbi to talk to, having one maybe two friends that went through the same or can empathize, etc). Stay strong and bring yourself to a high(er) level of self comfort and confidence (let me forewarn you even though you probably already know this, it is not an easy task. It can be difficult to the extreme at times but in the end it does start to go smoother-not necessarily easier but smoother). I know you said that she told you it has nothing to do with you or your situation yet at the same time using every experience you go through to grow helps get you through the experience.
I mean everything I said in the best possible way. We believe in you middle path. You can do it!
🙂 Zuberman! 🙂 (a smile rather than a grin)