MiddlePath, i have just read this thread for the first time and i must say i think my heart just broke from reading it. I have only one piece of advice to give you – when you pray make sure to pray that Hashem send the RIGHT girl bekarov, not that THIS girl should be your zivug. if she is indeed your zivug then know that no matter how much turbulance you encounter in your relationship Hashem will make everything work out. but if she is not, remember that Hashem has someone even BETTER set aside for you! but i will stress again – pray to find your TRUE zivug, dont pray that THIS shidduch shold work, because you can pray so hard that Hashem will listen to you and that may not be what is best for you… (this is not my own advice – i am quoting a Rabbi who told this to me a couple of years ago)
I hope you find your happiness soon! good luck!