There are three mains (listed on the aish website) for an appropriate shidduch: attraction, midos, and way of life (hashkafa). Everything else is unimportant. Let me give you an example. Both my sister’s husband and my first cousin lost their jobs right before marrying. Many women wouldn’t even date a man like that. Both couples are now happily married after many years, bli ayin hara. I thought about those three things in light of my current situation and realized one wasn’t there and the second was “iffy”. I think those are good guidelines to follow, not to get lost in long laundry lists of wishes.
