i have a maaseh. a guy i was with in yeshiva baaveled me for about a year straight. he acted disgusting towards me and wouldnt treat me like a normal person. hes the very intimidating type and i dont get intimadated,so i think he wasnt used to it and acted accordingly to feel dominant. i really have never in my life seen such terrible middos, or a person with so much to learn. needless to say i didnt want to have a strained relationship with a guy that i was near all day so i planned on asking mechila. i spoke to mutual friends (im honestly surprised he has any) who were aware of the issue and asked them how to proceed. they all told me it was totally not kidai,but i didnt listen and did it anyway. ill never forget his answer “Gimme a break; you havent got one real bone in your body” i left it at that. he actually didnt utter a word directed at me from then on. point is, its nice in theory, but some people are just nuts.
