Middlepath, I admire your fortitude and courage to post your story.
I was also pleasantly surprised and very impressed that you are choosing not to publicize your story further for, although on the one hand I do want everyone to see this and reconsider actions based on instinctual response, I think we’re all aware that stories like this can easily become only fodder for rabbi/jewish community bashing.
And that would be a terrible way to cheapen your pain.
You mentioned, though, that you think the Rabbis handled your father well. I’m glad, but do you have any ideas as to how your family could have been handled better?
Because the fact is, there are valid concerns. You seem healthy and sane, but many people from disturbing family situations do often come with tremendous baggage. While I would never espouse communal shunning as a response to anything out of the individual’s control, I wonder what else people should be expected to do.