There are, of course, many reasons. I have never heard anyone say that X is the reason people go off. People DO say that scenario Y tends to lead to OTD, or borderline. Obviously not everyone in scenario Y will go OTD – that will depend on their support system and what is considered “bad news.” EG: a boy isnt doing well in main-stream mesivta. If parents ignore his needs (what will the shadchan say if they knew we had a child in a Bais yeshiva (gasp)!)chances are he will spiral out. If his needs are addressed, and he is placed in a more appropriate environment, then he could thrive and be a mentsch.
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