And can we please not be Medayik Halachos from the Lashon of a “Hataras Nedarim” that has no Halachic validity whatsoever?
You don’t believe in hatoras nedarim? I’m failing to understand why you think there’s no validity to the standard nusach. Maybe you’re confusing it with Kol Nidrei (which, although one can’t say that it no validity, is indeed controversial).
One can avoid the issue of nedarim when accepting a chumrah by explicitly stipulating that it’s bli neder (also found in the standard nusach).