Who would not want to know if the person they are considering for marriage is a smoker or not? Some won’t rule them out. Some will, and that is their right.
You don’t have the right to be so shallow at other people’s expense, and expect me to play along. If you say you will only marry a girl who wears size 8 shoes, do you have that right? Do I have to play along with your stupidities?
Besides, this is not about rights. You have the right to not get married altogether. This is about what is the correct. And what is good good for klal yisroel. And what Hashem wants.
Maybe if you would think about what Hashem wants, once in a while, just for kicks, you might realize this.
It is not a matter of judging. Smoking is a tangible annoyance to many people and for that reason has been outlawed in public places. So what is so difficult to imagine someone does not want that in their living room for the rest of their lives? Or around their children?
It sounds to me like you are judging. Lots of things are illegal. Shechita is illegal in many countries, and bris milah was almost illegal in California.
This is what chanuka is all about. You get your morality from the yevanim, apparently. A hellenist incarnate.
I hope you’ll excuse me if I take my cues from the maccabis.
I dont want to hear the ‘relaxing’ argument either, as only those who think smoking is ok would accept such a lame justification.
The fact is, that most people who have tried smoking, and understand how relaxing it is, do agree with this justification. Maybe you should walk in their shoes, before you start ripping their shoes to pieces.
The bottom line is, that you haven’t even addressed my main point. The important thing in a shidduch is who the person is inside- not that your living room will smell a bit, and you will need to buy air fresheners.
There are many things which can bother someone a little bit about a spouse, but I would that yisroel kedoshim would see past a few extra pounds, or a little bit of smoke, or being a couple months older, and see the person inside.
So what is so difficult to imagine someone does not want that in their living room for the rest of their lives?
Your living room will not raise your children. Your husband will. Your living room will not learn with your children, and take them to shul. Your husband will.
Maybe you should be willing to trade your stupid clean living room for a good yiddishe lichtige freileche mishpacha.