Real Brisker – sorry, are you with it??!!! We are talking about a person who has been in hospital for hours, – think for a moment what this involves? Issues of possibly life and death? Thoughts of loosing a loved one Chas ve. or seeing a loved one suffer, or suffering oneself? The unknown, the scariness, a medical language that maybe one doesnt understand and definately cant control… the list continues a lot longer. Dont you think they need some understanding when they finally leave the hospital? -theyre waiting for the care and attention that they need – after all theyre expecting a fellow Jew to collect them, so theyre hoping this will be someone understanding, possibly who they can vent a little to…
Chessed is about thinking about the other person, not thinking about yourself. When we do a Chessed we have to think how can we BEST help the person who needs us, not how can we get away with doing the least possible!
I am sorry you got caught giving a lift to someone and it took much longer than you thought it would. But think about it- maybe the guy you gave a lift to was so demanding becuase he is completley neglected? Maybe noone spoke to him all day and him asking you for music and heating on/off was just a way for him to communicate with someone. Maybe he needed someones attention and care and this was his way of asking for it. Maybe he took you all around town because he felt he needed to be with someone – maybe you were his only company all day! Who knows!
Chessed means thinking about the OTHER PERSON and their needs, feelings and their world.
May you be zoche to only ever be on the giving side