Home › Forums › Shidduchim › If you've read "NASI Project Responds", have you changed your mind? › Reply To: If you've read "NASI Project Responds", have you changed your mind?
Lechayim120, I don’t believe an older single has to be told how much a shidduch is worth to her or him. And if they have the money they will gladly pay the shadchan who brings them their zivug their weight in gold without having to be told to. So why does this NASI project thing they have to tell older singles they need to pay more to have a shandchan work in their favor? Isn’t that a bit like rubbing it in their faces? Nobody wants you, do you know how hard it is for us to find someone for you? You need to really pay us big bucks to put everyone else aside and make this worth our while.
That is really insulting. It doesn’t take more time to work on a shiduch for an older girl, you just have to swim in the right pool. You need to look in your source book for older guys, divorced guys, widowers and the like. You have to know that you are working in a different age group. It is NOT harder it is just working with different types of people. If you are working for learning types you are looking in that source category. If you are working with “working” types you are searching in that source category. Choose your specialty and let people know what it is. That way you attract the right clientelle. Stop interviewing everyone and then choosing the cream of the crop to work with. That is what shadchanim do. Sort of the way teachers used to treat students before uniforms where the norm. They would pick the cutest most well dressed students as their favorites. Well that practice has to stop. The first 10 clients that rings the bell, should be the ones they work on. And they shouldn’t take more until they settle these. They should just refuse to take on more clients until they have the proper time to give them. They should be calling other shadchanim, Roshei Yeshivas, Seminaries, High Schools and looking for shidduchim for their clients. They should not be taking on 100’s of clients until they get 2 that match. That is NOT what I call working.