Why is no one in the velt concerned with the psychological fallout from all this?. What is a 21 22 yr. old girl to think of herself, when poor mommy and (rebbe) Tatty, have to schnorr to come up with this money (which they just had to do for seminary, an now for a dating wardrobe) just so nebachel “chanie” can get shidduch.? We havent needed it until now, why do we need it now?. WHat has changed? the only thing i can see that has changed, is that the boys are staying longer in israel, and the girls are going out when they get home. I say either put all 19 20 yr old girls in the freezer (which will never work) or , pick up half those bochurim you saw at R Nosson Tzvi’ s levaya and bring them home for six to eight weeks to date, there goes your shidduch crisis right there. Additionally, i feel, the gedolim need to make more stringent demands on the mothers of boys regarding getting back to people, and making timely decisions etc. Also, if NASI feels so strongly about incentives for shadchanim why does it have to be a big public thing? why cant a parent of an older girl simply engage the services of a local or family shadchan, and offer them pay according to how much time and effort was put into the shidduch.? The business of it all just seems wrong. Privately, there can be (and are currently) shadchanim who specialize in older candidates, why make it a public forum whereas if you dont cough up the big bucks you are blacklisted./?
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