Reply To: Help before its too late!!!!

Thank you so much everyone! I rlly appreci8 it! If i wasnt clear enuf, its like this- i walk the walk and talk the talk and no one wld ever suspect nething but i feel spiritually dead. like im not even interested in growing. yes, i heard many of R. Wallersteins shiurim and theyre fantastic but i can listen to as many shiurim as i want but if i hv no desire to change, then i wont. And wen i say otd i dont mean like hit rock bottom; just a lil chillin and ya eventually come back… ya, i may be the worlds worst jew but im so guiltridden that i usually hv a hard time doing something that ik my parents wld rlly disapprove of. Thank you everyone:)