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Proudbyg: I agree about the dangers of email but I wanted you to know that I hear what you are saying about the trusting people out there. The posters dont realize that they really arent out there waiting for you at all. They are busy and booked solid and the rejection from respected people is very damaging and leaves you even emptier. People dont want to believe that, but it is true. BUT that does not mean there isnt someone out there who can help, it means they are harder to find and you have to persevere without taking it personally. Looking for someone who works with OTD kids and telling them you are there to be proactive may help. Hashem will NOT desert you! Look hard and be strong and tell Hashem you expect a yeshua.