Reply To: PRENUPTUALS in FRUM circles??!

Don’t Worry Be Happy-

I’m thrilled to hear of the happy ending for the woman after her unfortunate situation. I hear her hesitation in signing the document, (which by no means makes her a gold digger). I am completely disturbed by the boy. What does it mean that he wouldn’t be able to take care of her if things went wrong in the marriage?!? This is what I find completely disturbing in LEGAL prenups!!! The guy could toss out the girl leaving her with nothing?? There are so many intricate details that need to be mentioned in legal prenups in order to make it fair. For ex: The money from their marriage and onward: whose going to get it? Is it split between the two of them or he’s making her sign all her rights to that money too? How about a time limit?- After 15 years of marriage he’s not going to give her anything??!! Looks like he’s the gold digger here!!!! What about in a case where there is children?? There is so many details into making a legal prenup fair and just for both parties. Its these legal prenups that are an issue, if they are not written correctly (as was the issue in the unfortunate situation with my friend just recently). Why can’t these people who are paranoid about their money jut give a halachic prenup where in worst case situations, everything is left up to the Rabbanim in Beis Din to decide. It’s hard enough going into a marriage happily, when your signing documents and worrying about who pays what if you get divorced!!! If people are worried, just give the halachic prenup, don’t worry about divorce, and if a situation does come up it is left in the hands of rabbinical authority to decide the outcome of both parties. These legal prenups may be unfair, and may cause unnecessary rift amongst people if it comes out unfair and insulting to the party receiving it. A time that should be a joyous occasion should not be marred by bitterness and dispute!!!