Reply To: Divorced and Dating

@ckbshl – I was assuming that @shmoel was referring to if you feel your ready don’t let worries about if you’re ready deter you. But I 100% agree with you, however even mashpi-im and others that can guide you don’t know you as well as you know yourself. BH I have an amazing Rebetzen that helps me get through everything

@Think first – Thank you for your post! It was very informative. I just feel worried, like I might mess up a second time. I have a friend that got married and divorced the second time round, and we’re still verryy young – and in addition I have children. I’m not so worried about if I feel that I want to get married again, because I do feel the pull. I’m just not sure how emotionally ready I am to start another relationship. But… that being said when I feel ready for something I usually know it 100%, and it always works out the best that way – when I try to push for something just because I feel “its time” usually that doesn’t work out.

@Health – Lol its been WAY past 90 days…. don’t worry. I don’t understand how people can jump from one relationship to another like that but I’ve heard it being done before and working out amazingly BH

@ yaff80 – Yes definitely there is way more insight, and I do have more knowledge as to what is important to me and what I should be strong on and what I should let go of. It bothers me now so much with my single never married friends – when I know their priorities they have now are going to completely change after a couple of years.

@Tzvi Hirsh – how would you know when it leaves you? Like most of the time I could be fine but something could flare up and I’d get upset all over again completely unexpectedly…

@ Health – regarding to the post you pulled from the other source. Thanks for that. One thing my mother told me when I separated was that if I wanted to make sure not to do the same mistakes over again I would have to change how I thought and some aspects of who I was to make sure I wouldn’t go for the same kind of person. She was also saying that if it was my tikun then to change that I’d have to conquer the tikun on my own without the “help” of a guy. I see it very clearly now.. and its not easy 🙂

As for who they were all about – yes now with hindsight I do see alot more clearly when suggestions come up but I also try not to only focus on that but at the picture as a whole because its too easy to get sucked into the “he’s not right for me coz of this one thing that he does etc.” mode that delays so many people finding their beshert….