It’s probably cus I’m from “oot”, and wouldn’t ever agree to live the big city life. My gut tells me living somewhere that actually has girls to date is very conducive to dating… May you and your family be mevorach.
Then a simple solution is to date OOT girls ONLY who want ot live OOT. They have a different mindset than in town (east coast north of DC), and are very practical (which by definition resists brainwashing).