Here’s a novel idea, instead of judging a person based on a list of perceived flaws–flaws that may have been out of their control–save everyone the long phone bills and onesh for lashon harah that may or may not be l’toeles and just meet the girl and see if you like her. if you liked the first date, have another one, and then another, and then another, as many as you need to get to know her. if you get to know her and you dont see a problem and if you think you two can work as a couple then get married. im not seeing what the whole to-do is about.
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