far east: My argument is that one can not know right away if the other person is attractive; such a statement would be ridiculous. My contention here is about being attracted and having feelings within the first five minutes. Sending the picture is the same reason I am shomer negiah, because it distorts my perception of the situation. Shidduchim is simply a process toward finding the person you want to build a home with, not a chaynek to display in the hallway.
Logician: “perhaps the women should come to the conclusion that they really just don’t get the reality of what men are?!….Either way just give it up already”
We get what men are. I just wonder why it is that men seem to think they have this upper hand over women. Is it because the odds are in favor of the men?
What exactly should we give up? Our self respect? Our feeling of self worth? Our values?
Maybe you should, or have your kids, go out on a shidduch date without DEMANDING she be a size[] or of whatever looks standards you deem ‘crucial’. Find a girl whose values and goals are in sync with yours. Then, go out to meet a human being with intellectual thoughts, dreams and passion, and see if you can become attracted to who she is instead of who she looks like.