of course – it can be very difficult to say no to a shadchan. i once did research about a guy suggested. i said no because my i found out that he was not able to learn on the level i needed my husband to be on. i refused to give a reason, because i knew the shadchan would just argue with me. the shadchan did research, found out who i spoke to, what they said, and told me that nobody can know how well someone else learns.
Anyways, i felt forced to go out with the guy – easier than arguing forever. i could tell that the guy did not know how to learn just by talking to him on our date.
(and for those who say that if a girl who doesn’t learn can’t know if a guy can or can’t – you’re wrong. there’s a certain amount of intelligence and logic that a person needs to be able to learn in a “lomdishe” way, and although being single, i didn’t know that term, i knew what i needed).