DaasYochid,
So if they younger guys are discouraged from dating, and (as it seems from earlier in this thread and others) there’s little impetus to have the 18-20 y.o. women actively hold out until they’re older themselves, then it would seem that (1) looking to the Hassidim as a model for close-in-age shidduchim will be of limited benefit, and (2) it will be an uphill battle getting 22-23 y.o. guys to marry close in age, since 18-20 years will be actively competing. Age bias doesn’t necessarily even come into play if you assume that for the individual 22/23 y.o. guy, most of the “top”/”good” women his own age have already married and so his choice is between the remaining close in age women and the “good” women from younger years. At present, there wouldn’t even be enough close-in-age women for them all to marry within 1-2 years if they wanted to, given that the women their own age have already been dating 2-3 years. Close-in-age/older as a direct strategy might still be very successful with the remaining “older” guys, or, if the 25+ women don’t have a problem with 22/23 y.o. guys, you can get the younger guys to date specifically older and not just close in age.
Does anyone have any information on the demographics of the “older” women? E.g., do they tend to be from poorer families? To they tend to get more or less education after high school/seminary? Or is it completely random?
Also, does anyone have any data on BTs (or gerim) who become members of Yeshivish/Litvish communities? How does the shidduch system for them deal with the fact that many haven’t (and likely aren’t going to) go through the BY – Seminary (- College?) or Yeshiva HS – E”Y – U.S. Yeshiva system? How and with whom are they set up? What happens to the women who become BTs when they’re already “older”?