WIY – I think what loca is trying to say is that you are completely missing the point of the argument. Nobody is denying the well known midrashim you referenced. Nobody here would say one should dress or grow their hair however they want. The point of contention is over the rediculous degree of specificity to which some Jewish communities have defined what is considered “Jewish enough,” and the overly judgmental and harsh manner in which those members of Klall Yisrael who do not exactly fit that mold are excluded from said communities; as if these members of Klall Yisrael were transgressing over serious violations.
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