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Are you suggesting a “war” to limit the growth of particular demographic? Because I wouldn’t just call that “Paraoh”, I’d call that “Nazi”. We have a right to have children; sorry if it inconveniences you.
I’m suggesting that is what is behind some of the non-charaidi thinking, yes. (Disclaimer: This is NOT what I personally believe). The “demographic” war is a known point between the Palestinians and Israelis, why shouldn’t in be in the mind of the Charaidim/Secular as well?
GAW, there is a chiyuv to force others to follow the mitzvos(not chumros) if possible even though it might not be up your American alley.
There is an old saying: You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.