hi refreshing this thread cuz its a big issue now. A Kallah got a CZ and asked the rav if she cud break the engagement cuz she felt it showed her in laws were very stingy. I x know details of if the inlaws cud really afford more but was a pretty serious case.
Can we change the minhag to something cheaper that will ahve the same significance? or maybe just instill values into the girls???