Reply To: Can You Suggest Shadchan Learning Resources? Shadchans willing to mentor?

Home Forums Shidduchim Can You Suggest Shadchan Learning Resources? Shadchans willing to mentor? Reply To: Can You Suggest Shadchan Learning Resources? Shadchans willing to mentor?

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mmbag
Member

@Vogue – sorry to hear you had a bad experience with MTurk

@Torah613 – I meant books about shadchanut. Also, there are some good books on marriage/dating for marriage that I think are useful to infer what you need to match people on. Ex.: I Only Want To Get Married Once by Chana Levitan

2 – Good idea, I should speak to a rebbetzin :).

3- True. I came up with what I think is a solution to this. Reject no one, and after hearing who they are/what they’re looking for, tell each person (regardless if they’re attractive/not, smart/dumb etc), I’m giving them a list of the most popular features. Bc who knows what each person knows, and this way people can become aware of areas where they might improve selves, if not already known. Love to hear your thoughts on this?

4- NO worries, thanks anyways.

@rebdoniel – that was really insightful and I appreciate that advice :). Thanks for sharing it! I agree that an open approach will go a long way.

Something I was thinking about is that it’s key to provide people a core for which they can admire/respect the other person, e.g. given middot. Bc ultimately the biggest predictor of divorce is disrespect in a couple, so conversely the greatest predictor of attraction may be a high degree of mutual respect. Thoughts?