Congratulations!
Maybe it is the way you are supposed to get over your low self esteem?
And to put my writer’s hat on for a second, always remember when you write something and you don’t like how it came out just put it aside and try again. Trust me, on the way to writing both of my books there were entire chapters that got deleted! And for that matter there was a book that got half written before I stopped because I was not happy with the result, I may come back to it some day, or maybe not.