The minhag in my family was to light two when I got married, then one for all the boys and one for all the girls. No more than four. If I would have had only one gender of children, I would have lit only three candles each Friday. And though I only light four candles, I always have at least eight candles in various leichter on my candle tray, four for myself, and four more just in case someone shows up unexpectedly for Shabbos and didn’t bring travelling leichter. (Kind of like Eliahu’s kos, but for candles…)
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