Reply To: Would you ever withhold a ???

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A Frum person could easily choose violating a Cherem over a lifetime of loneliness. We probably wouldn’t even consider him any less Frum for that. But there is no way any woman with even a tiny bit of Yiras Shamayim would violate an Issur Misah, regardless of what the consequences of staying alone are.

And that is an advantage? That his whole life he has to think he could be happy but for a little cherem that may have expired? And constantly wonder whether it might be worth it? I’d take the clear issur any day.

Besides, he has the option of trying to give her the Get B’al Korchah. She has no other way to force him.

That is also assur. She could kill him, but that is assur. (And highly illegal in most states. Unless he is a fetus. Don’t make fun- the gemara discusses whether a father can marry off his fetus daughter, I seem to recall.)

You know what she can do to get back at him? She can start being motzi laaz on her kids from him, that they are really mamzerim. We wouldn’t care in halacha, because ??? ?????? ??? ????, but if you thought smoking was bad for shidduchim, wait until there is a laaz of mamzeirus. (This paragraph is meant to say: There are lots of crazy things crazy people can do. I don’t see the ability to be a rasha as an advantage.