shmendrick, I presume your post was serious, offensive as it is.
The answer to your question is that, for starters, if you will be a better oveid Hashem elsewhere then you are obligated to NOT live in Lakewood and to live in whatever place that is, much as it would be nice to breathe in the air of all that learning in Lakewood. Yours is a question based on what’s known in learning as an emotional sevara.