lkno: That’s not going to convince her when she doesn’t think they’re profanity at all.
I don’t know for sure that I do either- actually, I personally have not such a problem with “what the heck” but I try not to say “freaking.” Actually, I try not to say either, because words like those are crutches- they end up overused and by the time one’s done speaking one hasn’t actually SAID anything of substance. Also, they tend to be conducive to certain situations- not only am I more likely to say a word like “freaking” when I’m upset, but it almost makes me MORE upset because that’s the context of the word in general. Sort of like how thinking of raindrops and roses and cute little kittens makes people feel happy (even if they, like me, don’t like cats).
But I DON’T think they’re curse words. In fact, I think they’re quite blatantly NOT curse words because in the popular context, which, as I’ve said multiple times here, is the REAL dictionary of words, they are perceived as absolutely not being curse words. Perhaps they’re seen as one’s trying to sidestep the issue (even that I’m not sure of as they’ve sort of morphed into their own personal identities), but they’re not even CLOSE to being seen as curse words.
If that’s something you don’t want to be seen as doing, then kol hakavod. But IMO, calling it “nivul peh” or “cursing” is a trifle much (especially when I started reading the OP and I was under the impression that she was talking about kids using words that get bleeped out on TV). It’s a sensitivity issue, but those who aren’t quite that sensitive aren’t doing anything WRONG.
WIY: There isn’t a curse word dictionary written on women’s knees. Any correlation between the two would seem to come exclusively from the guy’s side.