You are doing a terrible job of valuing your options. You think that this person might potentially be immensely valuable to you as a shidduch, and you are considering abandoning the opportunity because some people might think that asking someone to redt it is “not done”. Imagine the following hypothetical valuations:
Perfect Shidduch = 1,000,000
Odds that this is the perfect shidduch = 10%
Expected Value of Dating = .10*1,000,000=100,000
Cost of doing something that isn’t done = 50 (but that’s an over-estimate)
Since 100,000 is more value than 50, it makes sense to have someone suggest it.