takahmamash: I’m so sorry for your loss! hamakom yenacheim eschem b’soch sh’ar avlei tzion vYerushalayim. May you only have good ttidings to share with us. I cannot understand what you are going through, but as hard as it may be for you, try to remember that your parents have done so much for you to get to this point in your life for so much longer than 2 years. And although they were able to see nachas and you wont see/get any physical ‘rewards’ from your duties, you will reap them. The s’char is that much more.
WIY: +1
Haleivi: why would you look for a way out of honoring your parents neshama to the fullest after all they’ve given you? I’m sure its difficult, but it’s huge.