According to the recent studies I observed, the divorce rates in the secular world were astronomical numbering close to 40 percent. Although the divorce rate is growing in the Jewish world, I would think it a bit on the naive side to think that 4 out of every ten marriages nowadays end in divorce. On the same token, however, I do believe that the root of divorce in secular society does parallel a major problem which exists in the frum community which does seem to cause many divorces. T
That problem is simply that people nowadays don’t know how to be givers. They live their whole lives as takers and when they get married, they’re not prepared to make that switch to giving to someone else before themselves. The rabbonim in Mir would always relate this point as the reason for so many unsuccessful marriages in modern times. Its not so much the distractions of technology as was suggested in an earlier post as it is what results. The result of all of these things is a general mentality that “I come first”, that is, the personality of a taker. It can be very difficult to live with a person like this, but can you imagine a household when both spouses have this problem? It could be, that this character trait was learnt from the goyim as many of them lack the desire to give unconditionally. That same point which yields so many divorces in their community also disrupts our own.