If I remember correctly he says that if it’s not for religious
reasons or a REAL problem w/ shidduch for the child,
(not any personal preferences) the child is not required to listen to the parents. It goes w/o saying that the child has to explain only respectfully that the shidduch is ultimately for
him and therefore his decision. This is no heter in any form to be disrespectful to ones parents.
Can you please point me to the teshuva?
I have a hard time believing that R. Moshe would say that you have to listen to your parents regarding shidduchim if the problem is in personal preferences (i.e. for such factors as hair color, facial features, height, weight, etc.)
The Wolf