even though you guys have been talking for about a month i just saw this thread
TAOM- i am in awe of u!! ur so amazing!! (nd i thought my life is hard…)
what u said a while ago bout davening for your father to get into jail, i understand u completly but also know that these stuff do happen
i will sound like a really mean person when i say this but i davened for my father to die and when he did i was relieved, i get what your saying but also i agree with everyone and i feel that you should go see a therapist i think one will really help u
once again i cant believe what your going through and im so proud that you aren’t going and doing something like self harm (been there, done that i doesnt help)
stay strong!!!!