Reply To: New Reason For Shidduch Crisis

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#998945
oomis
Participant

If 1) all the “good boys” are learning in Kollel and not learning a trade for parnassah(and according to the Gemarah it is a chiyuv of every father’s to see to it that his son learns a trade), and if 2) all the boys learning in Kollel can ONLY go into chinuch, because they know nothing about anything but learning Torah, then what is going to happen when the Kollel generation’s children grow up, also go into Kollel, do not learn a trade (other than chinuch)just like their fathers before them did not learn a trade, and their parents are in no position to support THEM, because chinuch really pays very little? And what if, btw, they are really not cut out to be in chinuch? Not every genius in learning can give it over to Talmidim. We do our children no favor when we actively discourage them from thinking that making a real parnassa is of little value. It takes money to pay for rent and utilities, as well as for the Yeshivah education that we want our kids to get. Part of the shidduch world should be teaching our kids the REAL facts of life and not the esoteric and idealized concepts that our daughters are being taught about being the money-earner in the household. There is nothing romantic about a burnt-out, tapped out wife who has babies to raise, and a parnassa to earn, and I think that many girls are afraid to admit that this concerns them, for fear of being labeled something unflattering and therefore shidduchly-undesirable.