Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › i want my son to start shiduchim
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October 8, 2021 12:16 pm at 12:16 pm #2013537dugiParticipant
my son is 16 years old and ive been pushing him to start shiduchim but hes just not intrested. i dont want him to get married later in his life because i believe in order to get better chances you have to start shiduchim early. i started shiduchim at 21 and had a hard time. i dont want my son to go through that so how can i convince him to start shicuchim. any tips?
October 8, 2021 12:45 pm at 12:45 pm #2013690Shimon NodelParticipantI’m not sure if you’re serious or not. 16 is kind of young to start. If you’re trying to convince anyone to start, I would say start to find a good match. Then present the idea to him after you already know a little about the girl. This way, maybe you can get him excited and interested. If that doesn’t work out, you can use that as a way to really show your point of how difficult it can be to find a good shidduch and how long it takes.
If this doesn’t interest him in the slightest, then he obviously does not want to get married at all right now, so there’s no point in pushing.
October 8, 2021 12:53 pm at 12:53 pm #20136965TResidentParticipantIf your son is 16, how old should the girls be who are going to be redt to him? 14? 13? Can you see your son marrying an 8th grade kid?
October 8, 2021 1:16 pm at 1:16 pm #2013701Yabia OmerParticipantTROLL
October 8, 2021 4:39 pm at 4:39 pm #2013709☕️coffee addictParticipantDidn’t zman already start? Why all the trolls?
October 8, 2021 6:12 pm at 6:12 pm #2013733commonsaychelParticipantzman starts next week, all of these topics are most likely 2 bored bucherim with several user names
October 8, 2021 6:12 pm at 6:12 pm #2013734FrumWhereParticipantIf this were “real” it would have sounded like this:
My son, he shud be gezint, is shoin zechtzen yoor, und I vant him to already be in sh’deechim, but he’s very modern, in err vill nisht. I vant he shud have an easier experience in de parsha, not like me vat started ven I vas 21, in ich hu’gehat a shverre tzeit. So I need some advice, should I ask my Rebbe, vud he tink like I’m crazy?
October 9, 2021 9:24 pm at 9:24 pm #2013766ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤParticipantis this a serious post. why the trolls
October 9, 2021 10:29 pm at 10:29 pm #2013833GadolhadorahParticipant“is this a serious post??”
Perhaps, if the OP was located in Kentucky or Tennessee and and was having a panic attack that every shayna punim in town would be committed before his son showed some sign of interest in girls beyond his second cousinOctober 9, 2021 11:35 pm at 11:35 pm #2013876philosopherParticipantFrumWhere, your point is what exactly? I’m not denying that there are a tiny minority of Chassidim marrying off at 16 but the vast majority of Chassidim marry off much later. We are Chassidish, my daughter is 20 and only 5 of her classmates are engaged (out of 27 girls)
The majority of American Chassidishe boys and girls get engaged at between 19-21 years of age so your comment is ridiculous.
October 9, 2021 11:57 pm at 11:57 pm #2013885FrumWhereParticipantPhilosopher, chill out. I’m also chassidish, and my kids got married in their 20’s, daughters too. If I have to explain the joke I was making, uch un vei. My point was to indicate that it was clearly a troll (hopefully), and I made a joke about it. Sorry it upset you and your chassidishe sensibilities, but I’ll bet that most people who read it found it somewhat humorous.
October 10, 2021 7:44 am at 7:44 am #2013892commonsaychelParticipantI dont find trolls funny
October 10, 2021 7:46 am at 7:46 am #2013898philosopherParticipantFrumWhere, ok, I guess I didn’t get the joke …
October 10, 2021 7:54 am at 7:54 am #2013931Abba_SParticipantI realize your son may be driving you crazy and you want him out of the house. What happens if he marries the first girl he goes out with. Where will they live? A 16 or 17 can’t work full time and earn enough to pay rent. So they will probably live with you. So instead of having one teenager in the house you have two driving you crazy.
A better solution is to just send him to a yeshiva out of town. He will mature and will stop driving you crazy.October 10, 2021 10:27 am at 10:27 am #2014018yaakov doeParticipantDugi, are you ready to pay your daughter in laws high school tuition in addition to your sons’?
October 10, 2021 12:55 pm at 12:55 pm #2014129commonsaychelParticipantTROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL TROLL
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