A Cohen Remarrying

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  • #618069
    i love coffe
    Participant

    What are the chances of a Cohen remarrying after a divorce? Let’s say he is in his 20’s or 30’s. He can’t marry someone else that is divorced too the way most divorcees typically do and even they have a hard time getting remarried.

    Would he have a chance of remarrying a girl that never married before or are they “doomed” to be single forever? With divorce being so common nowadays I wonder how Cohanim handle these kinds of situations.

    #1161451
    Nechomah
    Participant

    A Cohen can marry an almanah, but while both are single, the baggage each brings with them into the marriage will be of a different type. Hopefully they can relate to each other well. I know someone who is a Cohen and divorced in his 40s after being a BT. He married an almanah.

    #1161452
    Joseph
    Participant

    This is exactly why beis din tries to convince a Kohen not to divorce a lot harder than trying to convince a non-Kohen to keep his first wife.

    #1161453
    Joseph
    Participant

    Nechomah, supply and demand will likely indicate an insufficient supply of almanahs compared to the number of divorces.

    #1161454
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Plenty of older singles.

    #1161455
    Joseph
    Participant

    Are older never-married girls amenable to marrying a divorced guy? How common?

    #1161456
    Pringles
    Member

    You sometimes find these couples where the husband is a Cohen and has been married before and the wife has had an illness when she was younger and so she agreed to marry him.

    #1161457

    “Would he have a chance of remarrying a girl that never married before or are they [sic] ‘doomed’ to be single forever?”

    First of all, there’s always a chance. Second of all, he can also marry a widow. My mother is a widow, and often gets matched up with Kohanim.

    I do know one very happily married couple that is the opposite way. He is a widower (not a Kohen, as far as I know) and she was never married. His kids were already grown when they got married and she was unable to bear children. They are seeking to adopt. I think they’ve been on adoption lists ever since they got married a few years ago, but newborn babies are in such high demand and especially for them as an older couple, they aren’t an adoption agency’s first choice. I know they have been through a lot of tzoris dealing with the agencies. But I don’t think that their different life experiences presented an obstacle for their relationship. They seem to be very happy together.

    #1161458
    Abba_S
    Participant

    A divorced Cohen has the same chances of getting remarried as anyone else, he just has a smaller pool of eligible candidates. As far as adopting I think they are better of starting out with foster care. There are older Jewish children that need a loving family which they can provide. Trying to get a new born is like trying to win the lottery while being a foster parent you just have to have a pulse and want to provide a loving family environment.

    #1161459
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Older single girls often prefer marrying someone who was previously married. I have been advised by many that a divorced guy is usually (emphasis on usually) a better choice than an older single guy.

    I think that a divorced Cohen may actually be in a better situation than a single older Cohen. A single older Cohen who is a baal teshuva would probably have it the hardest. On the other hand, there are so many older single girls out there including many ffb’s who will date bt’s and there are some almanas as well.

    Joseph, in terms of supply and demand, it is true that there are more divorces than almanas, but at the same time, keep in mind that: a) we are only talking about divorced Cohanim and b) almanos often have a very hard time getting remarried because it is hard to find a guy who is willing to marry an almana with kids. So if the divorced Cohen is willing to marry an almana with kids, I would think that he should be able to find someone (as long as he’s normal and nice).

    #1161460
    i love coffe
    Participant

    I heard that for Sephardic Cohanim they are not even allowed to marry an almanah. She has to have never been married before…Is this true?

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