February 26, 2017 2:28 pm at 2:28 pm #619329
What are good shul-friendly* costumes?
I haven’t dressed up in decades but I will this year?
Do adults without children and/or single adults dress up?
*In the past, I don’t know if my childhood costumes were shul-friendly.
When I was a kid, I remember learning that it was the one time when a boy can dress as a girl and vice versa. So one year I dressed as a football player. Was that too secular for shul?
I think I also might have worn former-Halloween costumes of a bee or cat. Today I don’t know if either are appropriate since they aren’t kosher animals.
Thank youFebruary 27, 2017 9:44 am at 9:44 am #1221006
Keep this in mind- just because it is Purim does not mean that tznius and good taste should go out the window. And I don’t think it makes a difference if one is in a shul or not- if a costume isn’t tzanua then you shouldn’t wear it no matter where you are going.
adult women in my neighborhood generally do not dress up – and I find that the exceptions get a lot of attention. Somehow, I find that contradicts the concept of tznius and I would not be comfortable with that.
As far as dressing up as a non-kosher animal, I see plenty of butterflies and ladybugs, monkeys, rabbits and other assorted mammals, but they usually aren’t any taller than my waist. Nothing wrong with buying Purim costumes on sale in November, but it would not be in good taste to wear something that was obvious haloween-themed.March 1, 2017 1:18 pm at 1:18 pm #1221007
In terms of tznius issues with dressing up, from what I’ve heard it’s not so black and white, and while the Gedolim might say that some (over Bas-Mitzvah) girls should not dress up, they will allow it for others. It depends on the girl’s background and community, etc. There are Bais Yaakov high schools that do allow the girls to dress up (as per the psak of Gedolim and Rabbanim who allowed it for those schools at least).
Lightbrite is at a stage where she needs to take things slowly, so it may not be such a good idea at this point to worry about things that are not clearly assur and may be a matter of minhag hamakom.
That being said, one does have to make sure that the particular costume is tznius and in good taste. I think that LB will have to use her judgment and/or speak to her LOR (probably Rebbetzin in this case).March 1, 2017 2:45 pm at 2:45 pm #1221008
Thanks LU 🙂March 1, 2017 3:14 pm at 3:14 pm #1221009
I. M. ShluffinParticipant
As an alternative, there is an idea to dress nicely on Purim, like in Shabbos clothes.March 1, 2017 4:07 pm at 4:07 pm #1221010
LB asked if adult women dress up, so I told her what it is like in my neighborhood. It could very well be that her neighborhood is different, and then by all means, LB dress up. But I think if women do not dress up by you, you would feel pretty uncomfortable coming in costume to shul. Just a heads up.March 1, 2017 5:13 pm at 5:13 pm #1221011
Whether or not a boy and girl can dress up as the opposite gender is a subject of dispute. This may be considered unacceptable or acceptable based on the community where you live. The same goes for dressing like non kosher animals.March 1, 2017 5:20 pm at 5:20 pm #1221012
The Halacha is that a person (at least the adults) should wear Shabbos clothing for the reading of the Megillah.
Otherwise, what LU said.March 4, 2017 11:13 pm at 11:13 pm #1221013
WTP – I hope I didn’t come across as too critical of your post. If so, I apologize. I reread your post, and it’s possible I may have read into it more than you meant. Plus I always worry about LB taking on too much, and it does happen sometimes that people give her mussar for things that I are not clear-cut halachos.
In any case, even though I do think it was important that I write what I did (for LB’s sake), at the same time, I apologize if I sounded critical of you.
Thank you for explaining what you meant.March 5, 2017 1:57 am at 1:57 am #1221014
I’m going to play it safe B”H and come in Shabbos clothes… I’m still new in the shul and don’t know if anyone dresses up (besides maybe parents).
Thanks, it’s less stressful to start off this way too 🙂March 5, 2017 6:49 am at 6:49 am #1221015
I think that is smart. Anyway, this year megilla will be right after Maariv on motzei shabbos, so everyone is already in shabbos clothing.March 5, 2017 7:11 am at 7:11 am #1221016
WTP, that takes care of the evening reading only. You still have to make a decision about what to wear for the daytime reading.March 5, 2017 5:04 pm at 5:04 pm #1221017
Of course YY, but by then maybe she will have more of an idea of what goes on in her shul, based on what she saw at the night reading or she can ask around.March 6, 2017 1:27 am at 1:27 am #1221018
Is it chiyuv to go on both days and hear the Megillah reading more than once?March 6, 2017 2:16 am at 2:16 am #1221019
Yes – you have a chiyuv to hear the Megillah both by night and by day. Women are obligated as much as men.March 6, 2017 2:28 am at 2:28 am #1221020
Awww. I prob sound so lazy. I thought that it was only once that was chiyuv. I didn’t go to any last year.
Okay… good to know. Thank you LU!March 6, 2017 2:50 am at 2:50 am #1221021
They usually have later Megillah readings for women who couldn’t make it to the regular one. The later ones are usually not that late either, so make sure you find out the times before-hand so you can make it.
Please be aware that the later ones don’t usually have a minyan, so it is better, if possible, to go to the regular one. But if it’s too hard for you, don’t stress out over it – there are many women who go to the later ones, and you are certainly yotzei (fulfill your obligation).
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