May 22, 2011 6:41 pm at 6:41 pm #597030
i tend to feel that people are staring at me or if i dont notice the person whos with me would tell me oh look he is staring at u!
what should i do stare back? or just look at the floor??
i hate peopple who stare but if i stare back im hypocrite what should i do??
(why do ppl stare at other wanna look np look and then look away but dont stare at them!!!!)May 22, 2011 6:53 pm at 6:53 pm #769742ZeesKiteParticipant
Who and What!?! (in English please)May 22, 2011 7:28 pm at 7:28 pm #769743ursula momishMember
np=ok?May 22, 2011 9:15 pm at 9:15 pm #769744
what i was trying to say many times when i walk down the street or im somewhere ill see somones eyes glued to me and if i dont notice it the person who im with will say look that guy is looking at u!
i what to know peoples opinion on this is it better to stare back or just look at the floor till u pass themMay 22, 2011 9:27 pm at 9:27 pm #769745Midwest2Participant
Different cultures have different rules as to what is polite when looking at other people. Some cultures look, others don’t. Some cultures count it a challenge when you look for more than a second. If you live in NYC you will encounter all kinds.
So – better not to look, but don’t stare at the ground either. Just keep your eyes ahead where you’re walking (good for not falling in holes, too 🙂 and relax. Shrug your shoulders and tell your friend, “So what? Why should I care?”May 22, 2011 9:30 pm at 9:30 pm #769746
Jewish culture, actually law, is not to look at an opposite gender.May 22, 2011 9:53 pm at 9:53 pm #769747jewish unityParticipant
yoyo-this is like the fourth thread you’ve started about this. You should really find someone in real life whom you can pour your heart out to-it would be really helpful (I know from experience). Anyhow, I don’t think the situation is as bad as you make it seem…I think you’re focusing on yourself a little too much. However, you should know that as a teenage female you will get plenty of looks when you go in public. No one is stalking you-its just in a guy’s nature. Once you pass each other, he’ll never think about you again.May 23, 2011 3:01 am at 3:01 am #769748SacrilegeMember
“You should really find someone in real life whom you can pour your heart out to”
AKA a shrink.May 23, 2011 4:05 am at 4:05 am #769749BSDMember
Yo-yo Get a big flash card that says “WHATCHA LOOKING AT???” Let us know how that works out for you.May 23, 2011 3:01 pm at 3:01 pm #769750
when my mesivta (that’s located in Boston) was on a trip in NY there was a NYer staring at a friend of mine so my friend just waved at him (like saying “hi”) and he got the messageMay 23, 2011 3:34 pm at 3:34 pm #769751
coffee- I have done that a couple of times when ppl look at us frum girls…. I think you should really get someone to talk to there seems to be a lot more than just this issue. Do they only stare at you in the grocery store or where ever you are?!?!!?May 23, 2011 4:43 pm at 4:43 pm #769752
they weren’t staring at me (read my post)
secondly I dont live in NY……yetMay 23, 2011 4:59 pm at 4:59 pm #769753
coffee- i understood your post… sorry for the confusion.
I know that you dont live in NY- dont you remember that I know who you are? do u live in Florida?May 23, 2011 5:06 pm at 5:06 pm #769754
you don’t know who I am (unless u spoke to R Wilhelm)
you just know where I live and where I went to HSMay 23, 2011 5:54 pm at 5:54 pm #769755cshapiroMember
Wow thats a lot of useless advice, I say just dont leave your house and make sure the curtains are drawn!!!!. I dont really understand whos looking at you?. If its a bper whos checking out your tznuis, I would just give a dirty look and walk away. If its anyone else I would just ignore and walk away or pont in the opposite direction and yell hey look its bradley cooper…then run fast.May 23, 2011 6:03 pm at 6:03 pm #769756
i think you need to speak to someone actually!May 23, 2011 9:07 pm at 9:07 pm #769757goldenkintMember
the person who is with you points out that someone is staring at you? so its not just your imagination? do you look different so that would cause people to stare? are you especially good looking or dress in an eyecatching way? ask your friends and family if there is some reason why people would stare. i know a girl who was always being stared at becuz she was very beautiful. it finally stopped when she got to be around 50 and is now merely good looking. but people still sometimes stare especially on the bus when there’s nothing much else to look at. take it as a compliment unless your doing something to attract the wrong kind of attention. this is definitelty something to discuss with an adult you trust.May 23, 2011 10:12 pm at 10:12 pm #769758
golden: so natural beauty starts to wither at about age 50?May 23, 2011 10:14 pm at 10:14 pm #769759
BTW, how do people notice when they are being stared at? Rarely will someone stare at someone else when that person is looking.May 23, 2011 10:55 pm at 10:55 pm #769760
its everywhere i go an dthe person tells me after the person passes
either i feel it or i see them look or point even and i look away and then check again with eitehr the corner of my eye ior look again quickly i def dont stare and i would wave if its the same gender buts its not so….May 23, 2011 10:58 pm at 10:58 pm #769761
How can you “feel” a stare?May 23, 2011 11:03 pm at 11:03 pm #769762
when someone send u wierd vibes you can feel it and feel they stare at u maybe ur just one of those who cant feel this sense but i have asked iother people and they have said that they do feel thisMay 23, 2011 11:03 pm at 11:03 pm #769763WolfishMusingsParticipant
How can you “feel” a stare?
How do you “feel” kedushah? (Or, the lack of it when I’m around)
The WolfMay 23, 2011 11:22 pm at 11:22 pm #769764smartcookieMember
Yoyo- you are opening too many threads about the opposite gender and yourself. You need serious help. Please go seek it.May 24, 2011 2:30 pm at 2:30 pm #769765BSDMember
Yoyo- Let’s try another angle- are you doing something to attract attention to yourself? Do you play with your yoyo while you are walking? Do you use an umbrella on a sunny day or prance around in short sleeves in a downpour? Think(forgive me if I’m asking too much )Once we get to the source of the problem, we, the shrinks of the cr can guide you on how to proceed. We stand behind you in your difficult hour.May 24, 2011 3:34 pm at 3:34 pm #769766mewhoParticipant
I have suggested in the past that this poster reach out to an agency that is well known and can either help or direct a person where to get the help they need.
Much as we are all kind , thoughful caring people, I think a professional is better suited.May 24, 2011 8:56 pm at 8:56 pm #769767Shticky GuyParticipant
Jewish culture is not to look at an opposite gender… My friend just waved at him… You are opening too many threads about the opposite gender…
I found these to be most unexpected replies to the OP. Hmmm… I seem to have missed something so I had better read it again. No, I didnt miss anything. So let me ask, where in the OP do you see that yoyo is talking about the opposite gender? She didnt. She wrote
I tend to feel that people are staring at me… I have people who stare…
This is the point. If we’re talking about the same gender then BSD is correct; do you do unusual things cos why else would they be looking at you. But if you were indeed talking about the opposite gender then you must find out what it is that attracts them to you more than to other people. Is it possibly eye catching clothing, or your make up, or your behaviour or anything else that could be modified? You need to think deeply about that. If its none of the above and you’re just naturally pretty and you wear modest clothes and have modest behaviour then take it as an unwelcome compliment. You’ll have to live with that until you find yourself a choson.May 24, 2011 9:00 pm at 9:00 pm #769768
read her post- she said if it was the same gender she would wave but its not!May 24, 2011 9:04 pm at 9:04 pm #769769goldenkintMember
canine, yes in most cases at around 50 plus you are just not as good looking as you once were. goyim call it gravity . the face loses its tone and starts to sag, lines and wrinkle pop up. etc. i’m not talking about people who use artificial means to enhance their looks. of course there are exceptions to every rule. yoyo, you didn’t respond to my post. if there is some reason for you to be stared at you can work on mitigating it. more modest dress or behavior. if not, find a professional who can help you deal with it.May 24, 2011 9:16 pm at 9:16 pm #769770aries2756Participant
YoYo, people have different natures. Some people do stare, some people look. Someone’s look to another can be exaggerated into a stare. Friends can do that in their immature excitement. What I would suggest to you is that you take it all in stride. If you are a pretty girl consider it a compliment. If your friend says something tell her your not interested so just ignore it. If you do, she will soon stop telling you about it and the two of you will pay more attention to what your talking about then who you think is staring at you.May 24, 2011 9:22 pm at 9:22 pm #769771smartcookieMember
Shitcky you missed a very important line that Yoyo wrote-
its everywhere i go an dthe person tells me after the person passes
either i feel it or i see them look or point even and i look away and then check again with eitehr the corner of my eye ior look again quickly i def dont stare and i would wave if its the same gender buts its not so….
Posted 22 hours agoMay 24, 2011 9:27 pm at 9:27 pm #769772
you must speak to a professional. its not so scary and the right one can work wonders…
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